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Thursday 26 September 2013

ASUU To Call Off Strike

ASUU To Call Off Strike In 5 Universites
We have just received information on a the latest
improvement from ASUU, and this time it is good
news for the lucky students in a select few
universities.
News filtering from ASUU HQ this morning indicates
that the body has reached an agreement to call of the
strike in 5 universities if certain conditions are met,
while other universities are been reviewed as at press
time.
The chairman of ASUU gave the list below “well, after
hearing of the plight of students, we have decided to
help some students go back to school, if their schools
can comply with a strict set of rules, as mentioned
below”
1. UNILAG: Unilag must agree to change their name to
MAULAG. Without protest, riot or diss track. If they
don’t like the name , then they should forget about
school till further notice.

2. LASU: all cultists in lasu must give their lives to
Jesus, come out clean and the killer of damoche (RIP)
must be fished out ..or else LASU is facing a long
strike.
3. UI: All students in UI must have tribal marks and no
one is allowed to bring any car model from 2004
downwards.
4. DELSU: All delta state girls must visit each of our
male committee members. Fǿя̩̥̊ virginity………..sorry
IQ test.
5. and finally OSU must bring 5 virgins from 100 level
and if they cant they should look for 1 virgin from 400
level ..and the strike would be off

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